Friendships after marriage

This is a post to give my friends their due credit. When I was a single girl, I had all the time in the world. To think of it, my life just changed three weeks ago when I realized I now have to cook, clean, buy groceries, do laundry for not just myself anymore. For a husband like mine, who doesn't even know the 'C' of cooking.. hoping for help in the kitchen is almost useless. However, we have a division of labour amongst other chores.

Okay, so what's the point of this post? The point is... I always thought that all my friends who got married just thought their husbands are their world and they can't look past it. When my married friends started seeing me less than before... I figured... marriage does that to you. I have some wonderful exceptions to this point because a couple of my married friends are amazing because they drive from work to come see me.

I always thought to myself.. I am not going to be one of those girls who lose touch with their friends after marriage because that is just stupid. Why would anyone want to give away their social circle? But I must say... marriage does consume a lot of your time. You genuinely don't have the time to see your friends as often as you like.

I also noticed... some single friends don't even feel comfortable around you once you are married. Because married couples want to go out with other married couples, and that's their friend circle. Somehow, I don't categorize my friends that way. I am still up for all the single-girl dates. Sure, I won't be your wing woman anymore but hey, I can still be a part of your day. We can grab lunch and have a conversation or two. Preserving friendships takes effort.

Spending time with your best friends one-on-one whenever you get the opportunity is better than going out in a group. I think it's great when your husband wants to spend some man-time alone with his friends. Let him go! Married couples don't always have to show up as doubles. Do not neglect your friends just because they are single and hard to relate to! I am sure people can talk about something other than their 'marriage.'

Getting married doesn't mean that your friendships have to end. People think you change a lot when you get married. You probably do in some ways. They will surely change and it will take effort for 2 people to stay friends because you have less time.

But I feel that I am still the same person. I feel no different being married than I did when I was dating the man. The only difference is.. I wasn't waking up at 7 am making tea and packing lunches. But I am still the same person inside. I am still as naughty and bubbly and all up for gossip and girl time. That hasn't changed, haha. But the important thing is to recognize that friends, no matter how old or new, single or couple, are important to all of us. We need them in our lives to keep us sane. The bad ones will be weeded out themselves and the good ones will always stick around. Cheers :)