Misjudged love.

Hey dolls. It has been a while. 

I've been MIA for a long time and I am sorry.  A lot of things have changed in life from the past couple of months and it is difficult to get accustomed to some of these changes. Other changes have been fantastic. Let's see what crazy things I end up doing before this year ends.

Well, one of those crazy things that I've done is recently gotten engaged =) And to be honest, I feel that I should write about some things that have been bothering me from quite some time. First of all, I didn't really think being engaged changes all that much.. but it really does.

So, no one told me that I would be OBSESSED with looking at my hand. I am talking.. dangerous obsession. I was driving in rush hour traffic today, looking at my hand and how beautiful that shiny ring looks on them. Another thing I wasn't told was.. apparently, a lot of people want to see the ring. So, it's a pain to maintain your nails and hands, lol. I am sorry if I sound like a crazy woman, but I just can't stop gawking at my own goddamn hand.

Second, everyone is going to ask you the same question. "Did he propose? If so, how did he propose? What happened that day" And blah blah blah. I wish I had an exciting story to share but I don't. At first, I had fun telling and retelling the story with the same amount of thrill and enthusiasm. But now it's like.. "Okay, he proposed and I accepted it. Let's go have lunch now?"

Third, now the only thing on people's mind is your wedding. If they missed your engagement, they will keep on reiterating the fact that they want to be there for the wedding no matter what. They want to know the venue and if I've picked out an outfit already. Whoa whoa whoa.. I don't want to be married for at least a year or two. And all of your married friends start giving you expert marriage advice already. It makes me feel as if I am getting married tomorrow. That drives me nuts a little bit. Okay, a LOT.

Soon after you're engaged.. you will find a lot of sours.. not a few.. a LOT. There is usually a friend, or someone in your family/cousins who just cannot tolerate how well your engagement party went or how you looked. They might even dislike the fact that you were engaged. Period.
I haven't known one person who got married or engaged and didn't go through the bullshit of jealous idiots who cannot see you happy.

You're lucky if EVERYONE is happy for you. Believe me..


My advice, don't dwell on negative feedback. I've even come across some people who have tried to break us apart by saying things after the engagement that wasn't needed. They only do it because we're good as a couple and that is punishment for them. Remain positive and always be happy because they are jealous of you. 

Always appreciate your best friends though. These are people that are genuinely happy for you. These are the people that actually help you out and become a part of your happy day. These are people you can count on. They are the ones who have been equally excited as you since the day you announced your engagement. I am talking about my girls who've taken me out for lunches and dinners. I am talking about my group of girlies that organized a wonderful stag party for me with that phallic cake :) lol. And I am talking about those celebrated their ass off (which is so evident because they were on the dance floor with me till 2:00 am that night until the cleaners at the banquet said we have to go home now). *womp womp*

But yes.. expect other people to be flaky. They're going to be so upset that they will wait for every single update of your engagement, stalk through it, but won't "like" anything and pretend like they don't even know. I heard from someone, "Getting engaged is the perfect way to figure out your real friends and weed out the superficial ones." Whoever said that.. BRAVO!

Another thing I didn't think about before was how significantly things change when you are engaged. Even the smallest one of his quirks becomes noticeable. Stupid petty issues start snowballing into major ones. It may even come to the point where you feel that you do not want to be engaged anymore. Little things start hurting even more because we start growing expectations subconsciously. Because this is such a crucial point of building your life together, you start freaking out over little things saying "I can't tolerate this in the long term." Somehow, you take on too much pressure to be this "ideal couple" that people see and to conform to it. Well, to hell with that.

The truth is.. you got engaged for LOVE. Not to show other people how happy you can be every single day of your life because that's only Shahrukh Khan and Kajol on TV. If you don't fight, something is wrong with you. Of course being engaged gives you a new outlook on life. From the moment you have the ring on your finger, you start being more cautious and future-oriented.. literally overnight. I actually started to dress very newly-wed-like a couple of days after the engagement, lol.

These transitions are funny and weird at the same time. They're funny because you're in the process of letting go of the single girl that's inside of you.. and transitioning into the engaged woman with much more responsibility. The only thing is.. when you're engaged, you're not transitioning alone. Your man will change with you. Both of you will go through good or bad changes together but the only thing that matters is how you deal with it. You don't lose anything. You just slowly become a strong couple overlooking all the negativity around you after going through your rough patches.

My mom tells me.. being engaged is the most beautiful time of your life.  And even though people around you will try to take that away from you, don't let them. It's up to you how you want to treat your relationship. You know how they say that grass always looks greener on the other side? If you're smart, you'll get the point. If you're not.. well then.. figure it out, lol.

I just had to let this all out after witnessing what it is like to be engaged. It has only been a month. I am sure I will have more to say in the future. So, look out for that :) Cheers guys!