Section 1 - my views on it (well, technically.. I should have done this one only!) Butttttt.. for the clingy lovers, I'll do Section 2 - the reality on whether you should or not (the unbiased version).
Here we go..
Firstly, I really wonder why girls and guys even feel the need to have each other's password. Is it to share the closeness? Is it a gesture of love? Is it to spy on each other? Is it to develop trust by keeping an eye on them and THEN believing them? How do we exactly deal with this?
Secondly, if you trust each other, then there is no reason not to exchange passwords. Then again, if you trust each other you shouldn't ask for each other's passwords? Could I make this more complicated? Yes, I can.. but I won't.. so keep reading.
Section 1 - My version - "It's all boooool-shieeeet!"
And I'll tell you why it is so. Well, for starters, everything has a "delete" button these days. Whether it be a phone, your email, your Facebook, your IM service.. anything! I mean come on, even a home phone has a delete button to erase any un-wanted incoming calls on your phone (cough cough, does that ring a bell? There was a time we used the home phone to talk to our boyfriends when we didn't have cell phones, y'all know it).
So, that already makes it halfway easier to get rid of something while putting on a show that you have given him/her your password. Don't tell me this is not true, unless you sit there on your web browser, signed into your man's account..hitting the refresh button every 20 seconds. It is practically impossible to be 100% sure of someone through STALKING them! If you feel the need to keep an eye on their account and their interactions with people, then you are giving yourself reasons to fall apart from the person. That means, you're actually sitting there looking for something on purpose to come across. If you don't trust the person, might as well consider ending the relationship. I don't appreciate men who run character checks on their girls, ask other people to find out about their girl's reputation, and of course ask for them to share their passwords. If you carry that many doubts, two things come out of it. One, you're sick. Two, you're very sick. A relationship is all about trusting the other person, and trusting that they don't lie to you. So, in my opinion, this password sharing thing just diseases the other person. The disease being cyber-stalking. Stop murdering your own trust people! It's not worth it. Moreover, I believe that our passwords should remain in privacy. That's OUR territory, something we want to keep to ourselves. I mean, I hope people realize that we like keeping some things to ourselves? I was asked nearly a hundred times in my previous relationship for my passwords and I did not give it even once! Why? Because I don't want someone to read my conversations with other people. There are some things girls can just share within themselves, and if they are lying in my messages.. do you think I want my man reading them? No! And generally, do I want my man reading anything? No! It's my zone. It's my territory. That's why there is a password to it, duh. I am gonna stop rambling. I am sure you got my version well drilled in your head by now.
Section 2 - "A well-explained version for all my haters, who don't want to listen to my advice" :)
Let's do this in a systematic way.
Possible reasons why you should share passwords...
1. You can probably demonstrate trust, if your partner doesn't trust you at all.
2. For some people, it might mean a gesture or token of love, to share something private as a password (i.e. for people who share debit card pins and credit card information etc.) *Losers.. cough*
3. For people who barely use the internet to keep in touch with people, and their accounts practically stay empty.. good for you guys.. your partners might think you're clear as a crystal!
4. You may actually use their account for finding out more positive things about your partner, rather than digging in murky details.
Possible reasons why you should not share passwords...
1. Honestly, let me say this straight up for people who haven't understood my version. Social networking details is not a reliable measure of trust or love in a relationship. That's the best way I can put it.
2. It is so immature to believe that this will make things better for your relationship, if you already have trust issues.
3. It may open a can of worms.
4. Here is something from my personal experience. If your lover does end up reading another person's message. Only YOU know how and exactly in what way is the message coming across from the other person. A third person reading (your lover in this case) might interpret something from the other end of the stick! It's just an open invitation to more explanations and problems.
5. Privacy is vital for any long-lasting, mature relationship (you wouldn't be asking for passwords if you were mature)
6. Also, past is gone. Why dig into it and screw up the present and the future as well? Makes sense?
Honestly, you don't need to reveal EVERYTHING in a relationship. That is what I feel. And passwords are one of those things. But hey, everyone is different and it really depends on the context of your relationship. It's really about the type of couple you are and the comfort level you share with each other. This is acceptable to some people and unacceptable to others. So I can't be the judge of that. I just hope this blog creates more of a clear idea as to what effects sharing passwords might have on your relationship.
P.S. Yes, I am pathetic, I stole the blog title from Shiela Ki Jawani.. now leave me alone, okay? >_<
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