He was a young kid. After a quick round of extremely bad answers, he left saying - "I am lost. I need help." HR is about the human connection. It's not just about getting the day-to-day administrative stuff done. I couldn't help but think - shame on his parents! This kid was South-Asian and I could almost vouch that his parents just pushed him to this particular job field without teaching him the basics. Why are our parents so caught up with titles? We already have enough social media buzz about this topic. Look at the movie: 3 idiots. The point of the movie was:- Don't IMPOSE your dreams on your children. Let them do what they want to do!
Why do we teach our kids to chase money? To chase big titles? Why aren't we teaching them to pursue their dreams? Follow their passions? Why are artistic careers such as acting, singing, dancing, even makeup artistry - labelled hobbies? They are very successful careers. Why is all the success in the world only affiliated to becoming a doctor, lawyer or engineer? Why aren't we teaching them more important values like - integrity, honesty and authenticity.
We should be telling them to be HAPPY in whatever they choose to do. We should encourage the skills they already have and help groom them into a career. Don't just push them to do what you think is right for them. Parenting is not about controlling. It's about instilling the correct morals and values and then setting them free to let them make it on their own. I have been so sheltered my entire life and I really wish I wasn't. I would have learned things sooner.
Do NOT ignore their awkward social skills / anxiety. Our culture believes in covering up for our kids because we are too afraid to talk about things we consider taboo: anxiety, depression, speech disorders and the list goes on. Do us all a favour by considering these conditions and help your child. Have an open relationship for them to be comfortable enough to open up to you. They might be hiding more than you think. With that candidate's clammy hands, his inability to even make eye contact - I knew that his problems go deeper than just sharpening his social skills. The worst thing for a young adult is to feel lost. And if we can't even rely on our family for support to show us the way -where else would we go?
Dear parents, I sincerely request you to just teach your child how to be a good human. The rest will come itself. Please be aware that your child has his/her own desires, dreams and aspirations. Do not suppress their autonomy by imposing your career choices on them. This may start out innocent but may lead into intense psychological pressure to the point they become depressed. They will spend the rest of their life pleasing you or resenting you - and not feeling fulfilled themselves. Do not be manipulative when they come to you for guidance. Do not teach them that money trumps everything. Try to understand their inherent potential. Look for signs of anxiety. Put them into extra-curricular activities that they enjoy, not the popular ones recommended to you by other moms. Not every child is competitive by nature. Stop comparing 2 siblings. For one child, it may be fit to pursue a career in medicine or law. But for the other, who is an introvert or more artistic - it may not be appropriate. Analyze your child's aptitude and personality. Be unbiased. They just need your support.
Remember: A happy heart is better than a pocket full of $ bills. Your child may be just okay to have a satisfied life rather than to live with a heart void of happiness.
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