It's another one of those body posts. And before I get anyone bashing me for being at the weight I am, I would just like to say that this is only to help those who are feeling the same way I am about bathing suits. I am not promoting unhealthy bodies, but I am promoting feelings of self-respect and self-love for those who are currently struggling with their weight and the #summerbody phenomenon.
For starters, I can't swim. So, I've never really had to bother buying a swimsuit. Secondly, I am afraid of water the moment it hits my waist. That's the most I can handle at the beach. For those who feel pressured to wear a bikini or a swimsuit at their honeymoon - don't do it. There are other options according to how comfortable you feel. I've seen people in swim shorts (if you like to cover the rear end) as well as swim shirts/tanks that are water-absorbent.
This is not a post about how low I currently feel about my body. It is rather a positive approach to how I can make the best of my trip without being too conscious about my body. Because believe me, that ruins everything. So, I gained all the weight that I lost for my wedding while I was in India. And because I just started a new life - everything is not in order yet. And it will take some time for me to get a routine. But anyway... back to the topic.
Instead of wearing shame, I am gonna wear a bathing suit. The last time I put on a bathing suit was with Kanchi at Wonderland in 2003. It's been more than a decade and I am ready for it. I wanna laugh, splash, and have fun. I refuse to let my self-image affect my husband's expectations from our honeymoon. I refuse to let him watch me sitting on the sidelines. I refuse to missing out on jumping into the pool holding hands with my husband. Let's promote self love, not self-loathe.
Today, there are a lot of options for swimsuits. A tankini, bikini, one-piece, swim shorts, skirt bottoms, swim tops etc. It looks like women have a lot of options for the pool. But my perspective is that there's only a few women that enjoy these options. Sometimes, I think... men have it easy. All they need is a pair of swim shorts to be at the pool or at the beach. No one is judging their bodies the way we get judged. Victoria's Secret has probably done more damage than good. We are constantly subjected to the media's portrayal of the "perfect body." But we all know that image is just unrealistic. Are you telling me it's normal for an average woman to be size zero with perfectly perky boobs and no stretch marks? Cellulite is real, people! Women have it, get over it. We have fat thighs. They touch. Oh god. Yes, they touch. Eff thigh gaps. In fact, they rub together. The fat is exposed. But is that a reason to be embarrassed? I don't think so. I am not gonna be one of those women who usually avoid body exposure by sitting on the sidelines at the pool in a cover-up. I am gonna be one of those women who love themselves the same even if they aren't comfortable with the weight they are currently at.
Why is it that men can be comfortable in loose fitting swim trunks at any weight and women can't? That is not fair. So, go out and feel your best in the water, in a BATHING SUIT. And if you don't feel comfortable wearing a traditional bathing suit, then don't. Wear swim shorts with a tank top with built-in bras if that's what suits you. There is no reason to be ashamed of getting into a pool. You might feel strange before you go off to your vacation but look around when you get there. You will not be the only one with fat thighs and a big belly. You will not be the only one with cellulite and arm flab. Embrace your womanhood. Enjoy it. Show it off.
As I was sitting in front of a mirror analyzing my faults last week, I realized I am only exaggerating them in my mind. If you don't love your body for what it is, you're not ready to stand in front of a mirror in a bathing suit. So, I decided to let this time go by in a traditional one piece swimsuit or swim shorts. But by my next vacation, my goal is to feel my best in a bathing suit. But that doesn't mean I sob away this vacation because I am not there yet. Shop for swimsuits that have tummy control. Some patterns really complement curves. Take time for bathing suit shopping and don't panic. My friend Kanchi gave me some confidence when I was feeling low.
How about focusing on stuff that is great? My girls look amazing in deep plunging necklines ;)
My legs look elongated when I wear wedges and my attention goes towards my bright painted toe nails instead of looking at the 'fat' bits of my body.
It's also important to note that other women have their own level of anxiety about their issues. Someone you think who may have a perfect body may have her own set of insecurities in the pool. That's why, I think it's time to move past all of that bullshit and actually enjoy what you paid for - which is an all-inclusive amazing Mexican vacation. The last thing I wanna do is bring myself down with low self-esteem and poor body image.
And people have got to stop making these RULES for the pool, unless they are specified by the resort. I think it's okay to wear a tee if you don't feel comfortable with the upper half of your body. I think it's okay to jump in the pool with a cover-up if it doesn't interfere with your ability to swim. I think it's okay to wear WHATEVER you want as long as it serves the purpose.
The inner fat child inside of me would just dip my feet in the water and sit by the sidelines and watch other people have fun. Do I wanna be that person on my honeymoon? No. I think I've come a long way from that. Its been years since then. It's just sad to do that. Because we are missing out.
Think about it.. it's your body. You live with it 100% of the time. You breathe, walk, talk, dance and swim with your body. It does everything for you. How can you hate it? Be ashamed of nothing. Make goals and work towards perfecting yourself but never hate. Nobody else should be able to make YOU feel bad about your body. It's all on you.
Also, let's not forget the purpose of going to the pool. It's to swim, to have fun and splash your husband when he's not looking :D It's not for vanity purposes, it is just practical. It's like uniform for the pool. We can't swim in suits and ties, right? We have termed "bathing suits" as something sexy when we look at the media perspective. We gotta separate the Victoria's Secret swim models from the word swimsuit. Because everyone I know panics at the word "swimsuit." We've made it scary. We automatically think comparison. And this shouldn't be the case.
I am currently a size 14 and I am not ashamed to admit it. I have always written my weight on the blog without ever being ashamed. I've always admitted that I struggle with a steady weight. I am always juggling back and forth because I am a big foodie. I was a size 8 two summers ago and I will do it again. People can see my body in a tee shirt and jeans and still think I am fat as opposed to a swimsuit. The size doesn't change in a bathing suit. It remains the same, but the fat is at a better display. That is the only difference. So, what's shocking about a swimsuit, then?
Working towards that #summerbody doesn't mean you have to be a swimsuit model. It's all about confidence. Your body is malleable into anything you are willing to make it. Fat can always shed. Your dress size can always decrease. The inches off your waist and hips can always disappear. But if you lose your precious time WORRYING about your current body, weight and self-image, you are truly wasting time. Let's start treating our bodies with the love and respect they deserve. Just sayin'...
PS: I will post pictures even in a bathing suit. Don't care :)
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